My Masquerade.
Welcome to the fallout, welcome to resistance
The tension is here, tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be
Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here.
I dare you to move.
(Swithcfoot)
(Damn, I love that song)
SO! Here I am again. I've been dying to pirate My Chemical Romance's 'Helena' and Marion Raven's 'The End of Me'... two very nice songs they are. (Oh, and also Coldplay's 'Speed of Sound'... ;P) Tapi mana sempaaat! Tugas2 begitu menumpuk... musti ini, musti itu... tapi ujung-ujungnya gue disini juga. Hehehe...
Days ago buku angkatan akhirnya dibagikan juga. Being an egocentric, I immediately flipped it open to where my identity is revealed. I read the testimonial thing, and I was like '...What is this sh*t? Who the f*** wrote this?' but then in the next two seconds I went '...Oh wait a minute, whoever wrote this was right.' ;P
My fault. I didn't --and never will, actually--reveal who I am truly in front of them, so of course that's what they'd wrote. The nice, heart-warming superficial me that they know and like, technically. (Things like this (superficiality), I already understood, very perfectly. There are limits and stuff, commonly known as social manners, our ancestors stupidly invented them, there goes our youth and freedom, yada yada yada. I've been there. So...bygones.)
I say, if I am whom I've been hiding all these years, I don't think I'll have a friend. Only fucked up people would befriend me. (Oh screw the * thing.) But then again, brilliant people are fucked up people. It's true! Just ask Van Gogh and Billie Holiday. ;P No really. I've been watching my friends. There's one that is cold from the outside, but actually warm in the inside, y'know what I mean? It's a good person trying to look bad--and failed, I'm sorry to say. (You're just too nice, sistah! :P I don't name names.) Maybe I'm being a know-it-all, maybe she's also wearing a mask like I am, maybe she's even a better actress than I am, I dunno. But in my case, it's a pure evil trying to look good, and succeed! I leashed out the evil and let her consumed me in certain times. It scares me sometimes...
...OR. Maybe I'm just seeking for excuses for my oddities--which I love. Even a drag queen knows her gender better than I know myself.
Anyways.
NYUNYUUUUH...!!!! Akhirnya ada postingan baru juga. (Sial! Postingan dia tetep lebih panjang dari postingan gue!!) Hehehe... keep it coming yah bu Nyu! Btw, ternyata dikau ada bakat menulis syair juga rupanya ya?? ;P Btw lagi, gue mau nyontek elo ah... bikin list the things I like. Hehehe...
Things I like:
1. Kalo gue lagi jalan di tempat parkir motor di depan PKM dan tiba2 daun2 berguguran kayak autumn yang di film2... romantis! ;P (Asal kaga ada ulet bulu yang ikut berjatuhan aja....)
2. Pergi jalan-jalan ke dufan, puncak atau Bogor di saat orang2 sedang sibuk sekolah, kuliah dan ujian.
3. Perjalanan pulang kampung atau ke luar kota bersama orang2 yang gue suka (dan yang ga banyak omong, soalnya merusak suara lagu!), dimana gue duduk di kursi deket jendela di mobil sambil dengerin lagu yang gue suka.
4. Ngeliat gunung yang berkabut, yang udaranya dingin dan sejuuuk banget... sampe ada asap keluar dari mulut gue pas gue nafas.
5. Dapet seat yang enak banget pas beli tiket film yang gue pengen banget nonton.
6. Pop corn with lots and lots of butter.
7. Kucing yang lucuuu... (dan yang nggak jual mahal kayak kucing2 di RSUT!)
8. Pergi ke pantai yang bersih sore-sore, ngerendem kaki di antara deburan ombak (Cieee...), trus ngeliat jauh ke samudra. Gue pernah mengalami ini pas SD di Bali, serasa dimakan oleh alam deh... gue ngerasa keciiil banget.
9. Bisa pergi ke tempat yang luas, sepi, rindang dan sejuk dengan angin yang sepoi-sepoi, dan menggambar dengan tenang dan damai... hehehe.
10. Kalo bangun pas shalat subuh dan tau abis itu gue bisa tidur lagi sampe siang karena hari itu adalah hari libur.
11. Dapet mimpi yang waaah keren... ;P The best dream I've ever had: Malem2, langit biru gelap, gue lagi ngeliat bintang, tiba2 di langit yang biru gelap itu muncul a constellation berbentuk Pegasus! Very, VERY beautiful! Besar and bercahaya banget! Di mimpi itu gue ngerasa keciiil banget. Ternyata alam semesta itu begitu besaaar....
12. If the dreams came true. ;P
Gotta go! Siapa tau tonite my beautiful constellation muncul lagi... hehehe. Hopefully.
The tension is here, tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be
Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here.
I dare you to move.
(Swithcfoot)
(Damn, I love that song)
SO! Here I am again. I've been dying to pirate My Chemical Romance's 'Helena' and Marion Raven's 'The End of Me'... two very nice songs they are. (Oh, and also Coldplay's 'Speed of Sound'... ;P) Tapi mana sempaaat! Tugas2 begitu menumpuk... musti ini, musti itu... tapi ujung-ujungnya gue disini juga. Hehehe...
Days ago buku angkatan akhirnya dibagikan juga. Being an egocentric, I immediately flipped it open to where my identity is revealed. I read the testimonial thing, and I was like '...What is this sh*t? Who the f*** wrote this?' but then in the next two seconds I went '...Oh wait a minute, whoever wrote this was right.' ;P
My fault. I didn't --and never will, actually--reveal who I am truly in front of them, so of course that's what they'd wrote. The nice, heart-warming superficial me that they know and like, technically. (Things like this (superficiality), I already understood, very perfectly. There are limits and stuff, commonly known as social manners, our ancestors stupidly invented them, there goes our youth and freedom, yada yada yada. I've been there. So...bygones.)
I say, if I am whom I've been hiding all these years, I don't think I'll have a friend. Only fucked up people would befriend me. (Oh screw the * thing.) But then again, brilliant people are fucked up people. It's true! Just ask Van Gogh and Billie Holiday. ;P No really. I've been watching my friends. There's one that is cold from the outside, but actually warm in the inside, y'know what I mean? It's a good person trying to look bad--and failed, I'm sorry to say. (You're just too nice, sistah! :P I don't name names.) Maybe I'm being a know-it-all, maybe she's also wearing a mask like I am, maybe she's even a better actress than I am, I dunno. But in my case, it's a pure evil trying to look good, and succeed! I leashed out the evil and let her consumed me in certain times. It scares me sometimes...
...OR. Maybe I'm just seeking for excuses for my oddities--which I love. Even a drag queen knows her gender better than I know myself.
Anyways.
NYUNYUUUUH...!!!! Akhirnya ada postingan baru juga. (Sial! Postingan dia tetep lebih panjang dari postingan gue!!) Hehehe... keep it coming yah bu Nyu! Btw, ternyata dikau ada bakat menulis syair juga rupanya ya?? ;P Btw lagi, gue mau nyontek elo ah... bikin list the things I like. Hehehe...
Things I like:
1. Kalo gue lagi jalan di tempat parkir motor di depan PKM dan tiba2 daun2 berguguran kayak autumn yang di film2... romantis! ;P (Asal kaga ada ulet bulu yang ikut berjatuhan aja....)
2. Pergi jalan-jalan ke dufan, puncak atau Bogor di saat orang2 sedang sibuk sekolah, kuliah dan ujian.
3. Perjalanan pulang kampung atau ke luar kota bersama orang2 yang gue suka (dan yang ga banyak omong, soalnya merusak suara lagu!), dimana gue duduk di kursi deket jendela di mobil sambil dengerin lagu yang gue suka.
4. Ngeliat gunung yang berkabut, yang udaranya dingin dan sejuuuk banget... sampe ada asap keluar dari mulut gue pas gue nafas.
5. Dapet seat yang enak banget pas beli tiket film yang gue pengen banget nonton.
6. Pop corn with lots and lots of butter.
7. Kucing yang lucuuu... (dan yang nggak jual mahal kayak kucing2 di RSUT!)
8. Pergi ke pantai yang bersih sore-sore, ngerendem kaki di antara deburan ombak (Cieee...), trus ngeliat jauh ke samudra. Gue pernah mengalami ini pas SD di Bali, serasa dimakan oleh alam deh... gue ngerasa keciiil banget.
9. Bisa pergi ke tempat yang luas, sepi, rindang dan sejuk dengan angin yang sepoi-sepoi, dan menggambar dengan tenang dan damai... hehehe.
10. Kalo bangun pas shalat subuh dan tau abis itu gue bisa tidur lagi sampe siang karena hari itu adalah hari libur.
11. Dapet mimpi yang waaah keren... ;P The best dream I've ever had: Malem2, langit biru gelap, gue lagi ngeliat bintang, tiba2 di langit yang biru gelap itu muncul a constellation berbentuk Pegasus! Very, VERY beautiful! Besar and bercahaya banget! Di mimpi itu gue ngerasa keciiil banget. Ternyata alam semesta itu begitu besaaar....
12. If the dreams came true. ;P
Gotta go! Siapa tau tonite my beautiful constellation muncul lagi... hehehe. Hopefully.
posted by Oryx at 10:45 PM
2 Comments:
masquerade apa seh???
Nyeee.... Masquerade ntu artinya pesta topeng bu. Aren't we all living in one? ;P BTW! Mane nih, kok kaga ade postingan baru??
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